Here we are again…the month of December in all its glory. If you’re anything like me, I’m sure you’re wondering how the hell did it get here so fast? You’re running around, cooking, dropping in at parties, doing your best to spread as much holiday cheer, all while spreading yourself thin in the process. Now, as a 30-year-old mother of two I understand why my mom always called it “surviving the holidays.”
Four years ago I was very, very pregnant with my daughter. I had recently transplanted here from the east coast, very few friends, no family, and due any day. While my husband is the best partner I could ask for lets face it…women need other women to support them. I thought I could do this with just the help of my husband…oh how so very wrong I was. It’s no secret in our house that I’m “the rock” so to speak. My husband will gladly tell you that I run the show and when I’m not here everyone senses a disturbance in the force. So, D-day came and there we were just the two of us in the hospital room. My husband was fully prepared, he packed his camera, Apple TV, Sonic Screwdriver, and Dr. Who robe…because obviously Matt Smith was going to magically appear in the TARDIS and coach me through labor.
By 3 a.m. it was taking all of my focus to breathe during my contractions. I sat on my birthing ball with my mom on speaker phone while my husband blissfully slept. Now my husband and I have been together nearly ten years. Divorce has never crossed my mind, but in that moment, murder did.
You see there’s just this unspoken thing among women. Women know what other women need. Sometimes it’s pushing you, reminding you of why you are doing what you’re doing, other times it’s something as simple as holding your hand. My own births made realize just how important it is to have other women around you. My own births are the reason I became a doula. My own births made me realize that while I might be “the rock” for my family, I can’t always be my own rock.
Three wise men might show up with gifts. But three wiser women will show up with the tools and knowledge you need to get shit done.
All I Want For Christmas…Is A Doula.