Getting married is definitely one of the most important decisions you will ever make. There is nothing more beautiful than finding a person who will be there for you no matter what. Caring for your special someone and sharing everything is a big deal and it comes with a huge responsibility. This is exactly why you shouldn’t rush into the marriage too quickly – there are some steps that need to be completed before walking down the aisle. Here is a list of five of them.
1. Go Through a Heartbreak
Even though this sounds very cruel and unnecessary, the truth is that even bad experiences in love will help you be a better person. Everyone knows that breakups can be pretty rough, leaving you short of Kleenex and with some trust issues. You may even think that you won’t be able to love again, but dealing with a bad breakup actually teaches you about what went wrong in your relationship. Therefore, you will be able to prevent these situations from happening again, which is great. You will certainly become more thoughtful and cautious in the next one.
2. Show Your Bad Habits
Pretending to be someone you are not is ridiculous – all you shortcomings and bad habits will gradually become obvious. If you have a skeleton in your closet, it is time to take it out and see whether you are on the same level or not. “If you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure don’t deserve me at my best.” – said one famous lady a few decades ago. This is quite true, we can all agree. Ensure that your partner loves you for who you are, because that is the key to successful and fulfilling relationship. If they can’t deal with your snoring, nail biting and occasional champing, it is definitely the best for you to find out that as soon as possible.
3. Go on Holiday Together
Going on holiday together can be considered as a sneak peek of your future life as a married couple. First of all, the difficulty of planning it is second only to planning a wedding. Besides that, you will definitely realise what is being together 24/7 like. An adult life comes with a huge amount of responsibility, and this is not just gathering a group of friends with their backpacks and hitch-hiking around the country. Your holiday as a couple should mean much more to you – however, it can be either the most romantic thing you can do, or the most stressful one. No matter what, you should not regret those happy and careless days spent in the middle of nowhere together with your friends. Growing up is beautiful thing, and having someone you love by your side is even more beautiful.
4. Live Together
Living together means that you will really get to know your future spouse. Such a step definitely comes with both upsides and downsides, and that is exactly what the registrar is talking about in the vows. It is up to you to accept them or not. Of course, as long as there are much more advantages to it, you can be sure that you are doing it right. Getting married is definitely one of the most amazing things in life, which brings a lot of changes. Just get your priorities right and realise that you don’t have to grieve for your single life – there are so many beautiful things waiting for you just around the corner.
5. Agree on Finances
Get your finances in order and learn how to manage your money with your partner. Even though you were able to deal with that by yourself, you will soon realise that figuring out how to share a bank account can get very tricky. Discussing potential financial problems in advance is crucial, because you will know what you are dealing with from the beginning. Besides that, no matter how much you trust your future spouse, you must legally protect yourself and your property. Agencies like Think Conveyancing will help you deal with some legal issues, such as property transaction, organising and submitting documents and preparing contract to protect your interests. This may seem irrelevant when you are fresh in love, but it is actually very important step.
Getting married is certainly one of the most significant steps in everyone’s lives. Everything looks very beautiful and simple when people are in love, however, things may significantly change with the first difficulties. This is exactly why you shouldn’t rush into it so quickly – all the aforementioned steps need to be completed in order for a couple to see whether they can overcome all those obstacles or not. That is definitely the key to success.
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These are all spot-on tips. I just got married in November and I can thankfully say we passed the test, according to this article.
I almost feel guilty for saying this, but I absolutely agree that having your heartbroken is almost a necessity before finding “the one”. If you marry the first person you were ever serious with its hard to know if its real because you have nothing to compare to. And it certainly makes you (usually) a better person in your next relationship once you’ve had some experience with being with another person for a long period of time.
Showing bad habits is important because you need to be able to be 100% yourself and comfortable with someone that you want to marry or you won’t really be happy.
And I feel like 3-5 tie into the fact that going on vacation, living together, and talking about finances all involve communication about “real life” topics. Experience life together and the hardships and complications that occur outside of “netflix and chill” dates. You need to be able to make plans and communicate effectively about important topics before you agree to spend the rest of your life together.
Recommendations for marriage
I enjoyed this article, and agreed with many of your points. I am concerned about one of you recommendations though. – that of living together before marriage. Statistics show that those who do have high divorce rates.
I would personally feel insulted if a man asked me to live with him rather than marry him. To me that says, “I love you enough to sleep with you, but not enough to marry you. I feel strongly about our relationship, but if we hit a rough patch, I want a back door clause so I can get out.” On the flip side – will you marry me says, “I love you and can’t imagine my life without you in it. I want to experience life for better or worse, with you by my side and I will do whatever it takes to make our relationship succeed. “
I know what kind of man I’m looking for - someone I can give my hand and my heart to and not have to worry he’ll bail out at the first sign of trouble. Living together is seems like a pretty shaky foundation to build a life on.
I don't agree with this article. Especially with the first tip. My husband was my first boyfriend (I've had one before, but it was like for 2 months, I was 15 years old, so I can't say that this was relationship) and we are the best :)) I don't need to have very bad experience that I could be better person. Everyday I'm trying to do that.
Interesting reading. Although it does seem like a good idea to get to know someone by living together and seeing if you are compatible, statistics don't agree. People who live together before marriage are represented in higher divorce rates, which is an interesting fact. I do believe that discussing finances is extremely important. Most people argue over finances. Simple things like who will pay the bills, how much we will spend each week and budgeting become big issues after marriage.